Today I don’t feel quite positive.

I’ve been on hormones now for four months, and my body is beginning to change. My waist is a bit more slender, my hair is growing stronger than ever, and my face is now very feminine. My breasts are beginning to develop, but they’re not quite big, and my hips are quite the same as they were before starting the treatment.

Some people tell me that there is nothing to worry about, that lots of women have tiny breasts, and narrow hips. But that thought doesn’t help me at all.

Even though I love my face right now, my body is still very masculine. Not as masculine as it was, that’s right, but still too much.

Hormones take a long time to do their full effect. They can take as long as ten years. That is something common for genetic women, who start developing around ten years old, and by when they’re twenty they have a feminine body.

I’m thirty-five now, and I’m in the same stage as a ten year old girl. The changes might be finished when I’m forty-five. And I’m old, and I’ve had testosterone in my body for a long time, so I fear the effect is diminished.

I know I must be patient. But this is how I feel today.

And with all these worries, I still don’t regret a bit of being doing this.

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