Yesterday I found myself trying to explain my transition to an old friend. She says she can’t support me in my decision, because she feels that I should try to accept my biologic gender. Moreover, she says that what I’m doing, taking hormones to feminise myself, is wrong because is unnatural.

So I put it this way.

Of course taking hormones is unnatural. All modern medicine is. Anybody can take hormones to, say, avoid getting pregnant. So, why are we transexuals sometimes frowned upon when we decide to take the only treatment that can help us live happy lives?

Because we are seen as if we had other choices. We are sometimes seen as if we just had some self-acceptance issue, something which can be fixed by seeing a therapist.

So I put it this way to her, and I really hope she understands…

I’m a left handed person. For ages, left handed people like me have been prosecuted and punished for the single fact of being left handed. We have been forced to write with our right hands. And, of course, with a lot of willpower, left handed people can learn how to write with their right hands. But that’s it. They can write with their right hands, but with more effort than right handed people. And they will always be left handed. You can’t change that, because it is hard-wired into your brain long before you’re born.

I’m also a homosexual girl. Even now there are places where gay people are prosecuted and punished for being homosexuals. And you can make a homosexual girl like me try to follow a heterosexual life, by inducing fear, self-disgust and guilt upon her. But that won’t change the fact that this girl is homosexual, and it will make her unhappy, fearful, uncomfortable with herself, and guilt-ridden. And this is because homosexuality, sexual orientation is hard-wired into your brain, long before you’re born.

And finally, I’m also a transexual person. Guess what, gender identity is also hard-wired into your brain long before you’re even born.

So don’t tell me how should I accept my genitals, when I’ve come to realise that the only way to go is to accept myself.

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